Working with Our Daughters

"Why did you do that?  You ruined it!  How could you do something so careless?"

Have you ever been there with your daughter?  We all probably have at some point in time.  Our words get the best of us, and we ruin a perfectly good time working together because of our impatience and condemning attitudes.

We would like to blame it on our daughter, for she truly made a mess of things, but, in reality, we are the ones to blame.

God doesn't particularly like a loose, condemning tongue.  Read Proverbs and you will find many verses on guarding our mouths.




Even a fool, when he holdeth his peace, is counted wise:  and he that shutteth his lips is esteemed a man of understanding.  Proverbs 17:28

But, we moms can get in a hurry.  We have so many things to do.  Our little brains are usually on overload which causes us to forget what we needed in the room we just purposefully walked in to (or am I the only one that does this?).

When we include our daughters in our work and/or business, we must keep in the right frame of mind.  There will be mistakes, some will be big.  There will be interruptions, usually at the worst possible times.  On top of that, we might be in a hurry to finish a job or have a deadline.  Our reactions to all of this will determine whether we can make it an enjoyable time despite all of the problems, or a "stay away from mom" moment.


It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.  
Proverbs 21:9, 25:24

I have failed.  At times I wish that I could turn back time and redo my less than perfect moments.  Although we cannot do this, God will continue to allow similar circumstances to happen.  We can redeem ourselves and put on a meek and quiet spirit, or we can repeat our selfish behavior and continue a hurtful and damaging cycle.

How much more our daughters (and sons) will want to work with us if our words are edifying and encouraging?  We have such a good time together when I have put off my old crabby attitude and put on a cheerful heart.


A merry heart doeth good like a medicine:  but a broken spirit drieth the bones. Proverbs 17:22

I love to have a good laugh with my daughters.  My oldest has her mother's silly genes and we can get pretty comical when we are working together.  I don't want to ruin that.  Our time together is precious.  Who am I to condemn them on a job that is less than perfect?

Embrace your time as you work together and give lots of praise.  Our daughters need to hear this more than we realize.

As my children and I are weeding a row in the garden or making goat's milk lotion, I have to be calm and slow down.  Sometimes this is hard if I am in a rush.  But, my focus should be on my children, not whether I get the soaps shipped out or made at a certain time.

For this is all material, earthly things.  My daughter's heart is precious!  I must capture it!

I am guest posting today at Raising Homemakers!

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7 comments:

  1. Such a good post! I got it thru Raising homemakers. I have two teenage girls (one college son, too) and the days together are indeed precious. Last night, I told them I hated to turn the light out on their pretty faces as I did bedtime routine (yes, I still tuck, kiss, pray at bedtime). Broken glass? Not a word from me! Peace and blessings. Susan Karsten WI
    PS(wish my childhoos nickname: Susie, had hung on like yours :)

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  2. Wonderful post. Thank you for the reminder.

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  3. Great post...thank you for the reminder considering I have five daughters.

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  4. Been there. Done that. Used to be that mom.

    Such encouraging words! Thank you!

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  5. It is a reminder to me as well, and I wrote it:) Thank you for your comments!

    Funny, Susan, I sometimes wish that my legal name was kept!

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  6. Thank you so much for this post! It is exactly what I needed to hear, and what I need to read on a daily basis. I feel like I am pulled in so many directions with my 5 children that I homeschool. I am ashamed to say that I often behave like you described--selfishly fussing at them for mistakes they made while they were helping me, when I should have been gracious, thankful, forgiving, smiling, and so on. I feel so terrible! But you are right. God will continue to give me these same situations until I get it right. And i may need lots of practice.

    I am glad to have found your blog!

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  7. Great post! I too have learned many a hard lesson, and soooo many times I have wished for a time machine to go back and change things! But.. alas, those are times when I learn the meaning of "grace". Thanks be to the Lord for that grace when we mess up. He forgives us and helps to heal the hearts we have hurt. What would I do without him. ♥

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I would love to hear from you! Your sweet comments are always appreciated!

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